What counts as cheating? Monogamous, monogamish, polyamorous — there are many ways to be happily committed. There are also, it seems, many ways to cheat. As I perused these articles, I found that many of them conflated perfectly normal, harmless behaviors like fantasizing about someone else with shadier stuff like purposefully saving the phone number of somebody attractive under a code name in order to avoid detection.
As someone who studies sex and relationships for a living, I was annoyed, to say the least. At first, I was tempted to ignore micro-cheating, and to dismiss it as yet another fleeting internet trend. The concept points to some commonly held beliefs that far too many Americans have about the loves of their lives, beliefs that could cause them unnecessary heartache in the long run. That kind of possessiveness represents an unhealthy and unrealistic approach to love.
This is because we — like many animal species — are subject to something known as the Coolidge Effect. The imagery and the way fantasy helps to block out the world and focus on the pleasure can be what you need to lift you away from the stresses of everyday life. But the fact is that many of us use anything from the down to earth to the wonderfully unusual as a means for getting what we want from sex.
Her first book the blood pressure-raising My Secret Garden - proved once and for all that women do think about sex an awful lot. Visitors to the Institute of Sexology exhibition at the Wellcome Collection in London have been answering a series of questions about their sex lives as part of an installation, Would You Mind? So far, more than 10, people have taken part, providing evidence as to the diversity of our sexual fantasising and richness of our imaginations.
Or just close your eyes and use your imagination. For more information visit www. Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies. Want to bookmark your favourite articles and stories to read or reference later? Answer: First of all, most men look at porn. Because men are so visually oriented, viewing naked women having sex with men — or each other - is almost as natural for us as eating, drinking, or splashing on the toilet rim when emptying our bladders.
The point is, we are generally looking to fantasize about someone who is of a different age, look, or body shape than the woman we are currently involved with. We crave the variety, if only in our minds. And the list goes on and on…. The important thing is that this is all about fantasy. So, wanting to be faithful to you in our actions, we actively satisfy our desire and need for variety by fantasizing about others.
It is a great source of fantasy material and thus, a great masturbatory aid. The bottom line is this: His interest in sexy, young women is in no way reflective of how much he cares for you, is attracted to you, or how HOT he thinks you are. It is also not any kind of indictment on your sexual technique.
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